Sometimes I Question the People Who Are “Representing” Me

Sorry, I haven’t posted recently. For the past few weeks, the thought of getting on my laptop just wore me out. I did give the idea of re-downloading the WordPress app a try, but… I honestly didn’t like the app the first time (why else would I uninstall it if I didn’t like it?).

So today’s thought coincides with a lot of stuff I’ve been seeing on my twitter feed. Now, I just want to say, again, I’m not exactly one for politics and I’m not one for getting into matters that deal with other people being angry and confronting someone who has a differing opinion. It’s not just who I am as a person. But I feel like in a sea of millions of women, I need to make myself heard on this particular issue:

The gaming community, the sexism in video games, and the damsel in distress trope.

I am not an anti-feminist. I am not looking to go backwards in all of this wonderful progress we, as women, have made. I support my sisters and I’m proud to be a woman. But that doesn’t mean I agree with some things that they want changed. Why? I’m not sure, but there’s some stuff I’m okay with that I feel we don’t necessarily have to dote on. (Also be prepared for language.)

Like the gamer community. I consider myself a gamer. I consider myself to be part of this community, even though, yeah, there are some twats who are complete assholes to anything with a vagina. But do you know how many of those people I meet? I meet like two. A year. And you know where those are? The forums of whatever game I’m playing. You wanna know something else? Most of the time, when I see “Guy In Real Life”, it’s a joke. I even perpetuate the joke; maybe I shouldn’t, but I do.  Because it’s a joke.

Anyone who says “Oh, you shouldn’t be treated that way!” is wrong. You want equality, so getting screamed at by my raid leader or someone for something I did wrong is okay. Being called a “retarded piece of shit” because I accidentally hit the wrong button? Not because I’m a woman, but because I made a mistake and that person is an idiot who I will soon put on ignore. The female gamer community is thriving. We have and we always will. The problem isn’t the guys, it’s the girls who do the sexy poses whilst licking console controllers. Like, seriously, that right there is why nerds are all excited over us playing.

I’m saying, stop calling gamers horrible people. You are including the very people you’re trying to protect in that accusation.

One big thing I see in the “ALL VIDEO GAMES ARE SEXIST” department is the armor of female characters. Yeah, I’d love to see my warrior covered up. I really think that if I’m playing a warrior or a paladin, I’m not gonna be in a plate bikini. That’s retarded; I would be dead in seconds if I wore that in a time period where I had to fight unless I was a barbarian. Barbarians are always naked, so clearly, that’s okay. But that’s the excuse I hear every time someone complains about armor in games — what about cloth wearers, eh? What about our magi, our priests, our warlocks, necromancers, casters of all sorts? They tend to be in revealing dress, no one complains about them. I wonder why that is? It must be because if you’re wearing cloth, you’re clearly going to be in the back of the fight. You aren’t going to get hit. And truth to be told, there’s still a fair amount of games where cloth wearers are covered up. That’s why I enjoy the World of Warcraft transmog system: I can go in and change whatever piece of armor I’m currently wearing to look like another of the same armor type. I can choose to look like a sexy priest or I could look like a nun (no, literally, a nun, it’d just be brown instead of black). I can transmog my plate wearer’s armor to be this head to toe beast of destruction and just look super badass swinging my sword. We have options. And the only game developers who seem to have decided that every female character has big boobs and is scantily clad are somehow Asian. Take your fight to them.

Now the damsel in distress trope. Ah, yes. My favorite and I’m sure your favorite, too.

I feel like feminists have decided that if there’s a damsel in distress in a game or a movie or something, it’s going to undo everything they’ve worked for — which it won’t. Like, seriously, people. You’re not going to die just because Princess Peach has gotten herself kidnapped by Bowser. You won’t die just because Princess Whoever in the next Disney film is going to get rescued. I mean, seriously. You will not die because of this trope. I guarantee you that. Stop getting so pissy over it. It is alright of our daughters, our nieces, our sisters to want to be a pretty princess and in need of rescue. It’s okay to say “Hey, guys, here’s this game I want you to play where you have to rescue this woman!” It will not kill us to feel feminine and pretty and like there’s glitter and unicorns and rainbows pouring out of our vaginas.  It’s okay to want be rescued sometimes. Maybe it isn’t because we’re locked in a tower, maybe we just need help sometimes. And it doesn’t have to be your romantic partner doing the rescuing; maybe it’s your best friend, who’s a girl, who saves you in the nick of time from jumping somewhere you don’t wanna be. It’s okay.

What I do, however, dislike about the Damsel/Princess crap is maybe what irks most feminists. It’s the “needy” girl. The girl who has to have a man in her life to be able to live. That’s not okay. So before your daughter is about ten, sit her down and tell her that she is a strong independent black woman and she don’t need no man. She’ll do fine on her own. But keep in mind: you, as a parent, should help your daughter realize that she’s strong, intelligent, and beautiful and that she really does not need to rely on anybody but herself.

That being said, ladies, all in all, I really think you need to stop worrying about the gamer community and games. You need to be worrying about the employees of the corporations who create games. I believe it’s Sony that’s the big one with the issues via women? I don’t remember, but it was something like that.

And just to reinforce this opinion I have feminists: seriously, you sometimes make me feel being a woman is bad because I’m not supposed to be “girly”. You need to stop. Twirling in pink tutus while throwing confetti everwhere is perfectly okay and if it’s gonna spite you, I will show up to a convention and do just that. Get ready for the rain, muthafuckas.

*Again, this is out of character for me to post this. I am stating my views and I’m trying to be as coherent and nice and stuff as possible. That being said, that last part with the rain is a joke. If you take issue with that after this warning, you’re a stick in the mud.

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2 thoughts on “Sometimes I Question the People Who Are “Representing” Me

  1. At first, I was a little confused on the angle you were going for but then I realized where you were heading with this and I did a little yay dance in my head. This is a little off topic but this discussion reminds me a lot about the (now infamous) Dove commercial with the beauty sketches. SO many women (and feminists, I suppose) raised this enormous fuss about how the ad was basically saying that women were only valuable if they were beautiful and perceived as beautiful by other people. But to me, that wasn’t the point of the ad at all. The point was for us as women, to see ourselves more clearly and recognize the impact that our OWN perceptions have on us as opposed to what others think. Sure, they brought in outside people to validate themselves but how else would they get self-hating women to start seeing things differently?
    I completely agree with you that feminists need to calm the hell down and realize that it’s okay to be girly. I think many of them tend to overcompensate for fear that they won’t be treated or valued equally. But when they do that, it just makes women look even sillier and (ironically) become targets of ridicule because of their reactions. (“Oh look, it’s those feminists again. Women will be women.”) Sorry for the mini-essay but I’m really glad you offered up your perspective on this. It’s good to know there’s another woman out there who isn’t getting all hot and bothered, questioning every tiny thing about whether or not that’s a fair judgment on females.

    • Ah, sorry to confuse you at first! Yes, my whole issue is that feminists seem to think we have to be masculine or something. It’s incredibly annoying.
      Go right ahead and cite examples! I don’t pay much attention to commercials, but when there’s something I have to see everyday, I start to emerge and see it. For me, it was mostly video games and female characters in them, as well as the gaming community. And having to see “Ugh, I hate the gaming community, they’re horrible people because they don’t like women!” on my Twitter feed for days on straight bothered me greatly. So that was my basis, when really, it was my before mentioned issue that I wanted to get out there.
      I’m glad we agree, it definitely is a nice change to meet someone who feels the same way. Thank you so much, Lillian. 🙂

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